How to Get Free Food (Basic)

If there is already a tutorial on this, do not flame, instead just see this as my version. I have a few different methods:

METHOD #1:
1) Get some food (e.g. fries)
2) Pull out a piece of hair
3) Put it in the food
4) Return food and complain
5) ???
6) Profit

METHOD #2:
Note: This is mainly for drive throughs.
1) When you get to talk to a worker, tell them someone you know (friend, relative, etc.) was just there and did not receive an item he/she ordered. He/she is already home across town and knew you were on the way over, so he/she called you to pick it up for them.
2) If they are stupid and ask for the receipt, repeat step 1. If not, proceed to step 3.
3) ???
4) Profit

METHOD #3:
1) Go to a restaurant and eat in.
2) For your sides, order things that sound similar (e.g. fries or rice)
3) When your meal comes, tell them you ordered the similar sounding item. (e.g. "I ordered fries, not rice.")
4) ???
5) Profit
screenshot Of reader Lens